December.

Hello my loves...

I haven't written anything as of late and strangely enough got a request to write a new blog post today. STRANGE!  Needless to say, my year was going fairly decent.  Couldn't complain to much, had a great Christmas, New Years, birthday and I went the Backstreet Boys concert.  Year=made! Until this summer. My world got flipped upside down.  Something happened that I never thought would happen to me or my family.  I will not go into great detail about it, as those involved need their privacy, as do I.  

Family is the single handed most important thing in life.  Without your family, who do you really have? Sure, you have friends but they aren't always there to pick up the pieces or to talk to when your screaming or crying.  But for me, I do not know where I would be without my two best friends Breanne and Hannah.  They have become part of my family.  

Hannah, I called crying so hard this summer that I couldn't breathe and she talked to me and calmed me down from something I thought I would never recover from.  Hannah has been my best friend since grade 7.  We met through our mutual friend Jordyn and we inseparable ever since.  Although she has moved to Coaldale and met the most amazing man, Jesse; she is always there for me. Not matter what time it is, whether it's good news or bad she's always been there, for that I will be eternally grateful.

Breanne, she has been my rock. My go-to person. My constant friend and has always had my back.  Giving me distractions from my broken life. Breanne and I met back in the good-ol days of Star's basketball where her dad, Pat, was my coach.  We weren't all that close during school, but after graduation we reconnected and have't grown apart since.  She is my JamMama for our Jamberry business and love that I get to share that experience with my best friend. I am so proud of her, and her accomplishments of getting her degree this year and pursuing her dream of being a teacher. AND to top it all off, she has the best boyfriend Kody and they just moved into the most amazing house together. I do not know what I would do without her in my life.

I owe both of these girls so much, but could never repay them for what they have done for me because you cannot put a price on it.  It's amazing to have these people around and to feel supported and loved.

As for family, Jordan, my older brother has been the most outstanding human and most loving and understanding.  I honestly do not know what I would do without him.  I would be broken.  To say we have always been this close would not be true.  He did his thing and worked on the farm when we were kids and was definitely a daddy's boy.  Where as myself, I was a mama's girl from the get-go.  Jordan has taught me so many things in life.  How to ride a dirt bike, how to shoot a gun, how to crash a quad.... how to throw darts and get them stuck in your siblings ankles.... But most of all he's taught me what family means and how to love that special person in your life.  I look at him and my sister-in-law Katie's marriage and there is so much love.  I hope one day I can be as happy as they are.  Especially with a kid as damn cute as my nephew Dane.

I could not even imagine my life now without my nephew Dane.  Not a fricken chance.  He brings so much love and laughter to our family.  His smile melts my heart.  He's got the best dimples and giggle I've ever seen.  I die a little bit inside when he crawls over to me and wants me to pick him up.  He's got the most amazing personality and I cannot wait to see this kid grow up. (NOT THAT THIS SHOULD HAPPEN FAST!!) I am so excited for when he gets to be a big brother one day.  These kids will have hit the lottery in the parent department.

Please do not take your family and friends for granted.  Sometimes, they are all you have and or need to get through tough times.  Love them, appreciate them and be there for them.  Sometimes people need you more than you know.


cheers! xoxox

Friends.

HUMP DAYYYY!

Happy Wednesday kids! So I've come to notice this is becoming more of a monthly blog which hey, I'm okay with because it takes a lot of my already dead brain to put something together.  And tonight it is specifically painful as I am dying of a migraine, but I felt I needed to put something together as this past weekend I did a lot of thinking.

The few friends I have, let me tell you, they are amazing.  New, old, near or far, they are there when I need them.  My best friend graduated from university and had a party at her house and I was lucky enough to be invited to join the festivities.  Some of the people in attendance I'd never met before, some I hadn't seen since high school and some I knew but wasn't overly close with.  You know, I had the best time.  I was out of my comfort zone. I was meeting new people.  I was laughing and having the best time with the greatest people and you never know who you will meet until you push yourself out of that comfort zone or out of your own bubble.  "B" has the greatest friends and it's not that I never knew them, it was that I'd never taken the time to get to know them when I was younger.

As you grow older you become friends with people who in high school you never talked to or associated with or complete strangers.  The sad thing is, is that I put so much time into the friendships I had in high school and I don't even talk to half of those people anymore.  Most of them either have kids or are married by now and I'm all over here like, "heyyyy, I'm still being single and awesome…" haha just kidding. But honestly though, everyone has moved on with their lives and its not who you were in high school anymore.  I go home every so often and I still see some of the same people hanging out in the same groups doing the exact same thing they did every Saturday night.  Getting drunk and hooking up with the same people.  I mean yea, sure, if you are leading a fulfilling life I'm not here to judge you, but there is more to life than getting drunk every weekend and there is a hell of a lot more to life than Strathmore.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, thank you.  Thank you to the people who have stuck around.  Thank you to the newest people in my life for being there now, I'm glad your here!  And thank you to the assholes who left, because without the pain, there would be no lessons to learn and no way to know that I deserve better.

xoxo cheers! 

Analysis.

Welp. Here we go again.  It is currently 11:38pm on a Saturday night and I am laying in my bed pondering life again.  Analysis.  It's the worst.  I over think everything.  Today was a day of over thinking things.  A certain scenario particularly pops to the mind when I rethink the day, but let's not hash up the dirty details of my life as to be completely honest it's the biggest waste of time and extremely boring. I shall make a list of things below of which I shall evaluate.

Numero Uno - I caught myself thinking of the things I need to do to make me content with the way things are going in my life.  Which to be completely honest, could use some serious re-evaluation.  The people that are in it, for one.  That's a major thing I need to think about.  I seem to think I need to surround myself with people who use me.  Not today mothafucka.  Not going to happen anymore.  If you want to be in my life, BE THERE.  If you don't, BEAT IT.  I'm sick and tired of these people who think they can come and go as they please.  If you think I'm always going to be there for you, think again.  It's time to find someone else to use and abuse because this chick has checked the fuck out.  

Numero Dos - Living life to the fullest.  I honestly do nothing exciting.  Well sometimes I do exciting things.  Like last night I went to the Backstreet Boys with my bestest friend Breanne.  Yep, probably the best time I've had in a super long time.  Also, last weekend went to random hall party in Keoma, of all places, that my sister-in-law's brother was throwing.  Hella good time.  NEVER drink a wine-mixer beverage if someone offers you one.  Well maybe it was just his wine-mixer beverage because 2 of those bad boys and you could likely die.  Anywho, that's about the most excitement I've had for awhile.  Even my birthday was a bore.  T-Swift made turning 22 sound like the funnest thing in the history of the planet.  Well she was a lying bitch.  Honestly though, I have to start indulging in things that interest me more.  I need to get back into photography.  I need to start swimming again.  I need to shoot gophers on the weekends because it's a way to release anger and stress.

Numero Tres - This one is big.  Don't sweat the small stuff.  Que sera sera.  Whatever will be, will be.  I'm tired of sitting around stressing about things that shouldn't matter.  Things that are so insignificant to life and how things are going to be in the future that I am wasting my life away.  I take a simple comment or glance from someone so personally.  Other people don't give a flying fuck what I'm doing, who I am, where I came from, or where I'm going.  So why should I let it bother me.  I'm done.

With all this nonsense said,  I hope some of you, too, can possibly relate.  Love the people that love you back, and be free of the ones who drag you down.

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." - Dr. Seuss

Boudoir.

Ola kids!  So a couple of months ago I decided, well I wouldn't say I decided more or less I was forced by a very dear friend of mine to do a boudoir photoshoot.  Lemme tell you, I was horrified.  Absolutely scared shitless.  Then I decided to wait last minute to figure out what I was going to wear.  Worst idea ever.  I am the queen of procrastination.  Legitimately.  The worst.  But I did it.  Found something that I didn't look like a fat whore in and bucked up and bought it.  The hair and make up… top notch.  The photography… amazing.  It gives you a sense of self confidence.  It's great.  Here are a couple of my favourites! :)

Judgement.

Hello kids.  I've been asked where my blog has gone so figured I would muster something up and fulfil your greedy hearts with a sappy sort of fuck you post.  So here it goes.

Growing up I considered myself to be a pretty outgoing person and could get along with just about anyone.  Until now.  I get so frustrated with everyone.  We all have the pre-perceved notions of people before two words come out of their mouths.  "Oh that bitch looked at me wrong, I hate her guts."  Fuck you.  You or even myself do not know what kind of lives these people live.  That girl you called a slut, she got raped as a child.  That boy you called a nerd, he would try out for the basketball team and probably be captain but is scared of getting the shit kicked out of him at tryouts.

I recently got a couple new tattoos and have gotten the weirdest reactions to them.  "Why would you put that on your body?" or "why don't you just tattoo your work address on you?" or "if I give you my autograph will you get it as a tattoo too?"  You know what? KISS MY ASS!  I got two things that are important to me.  Sure you may not know what it means, but instead of judging me, why don't you ask me what it means to me or what the significance of it is?  I was actually hurt by the reactions I got.  So here is the reasoning for you people who might be wondering.  The tattoo on my collar bone is the legal land description of my parents farm.  Why? Because that's where I grew up, it's home.  It's apart of who I am.  It made me the person I am today.  The tattoo on my foot, that is for my Grams.  The one who passed away a couple of years ago.  It is her sign off from my 4th birthday card.  In her writing. It's perfect.  It looks identical to the writing from the card.  So please tell me that these aren't sentimental or that I should go get your signature tattooed on my body.  The only place those would go would be on my ass with an X through it.

I am not saying in the slightest that I am not judgemental, because trust me I am.  But keep your snide comments to yourself.  I'm so tired of having to defend myself and other people because someone doesn't like what they are doing or how they look.

Love one another, be grateful for the people you have in your life because you never know when they decide their time is done.

xoxo

Love.

Feelings.  How does one properly convey how they are feeling to someone with out A) hurting someone else's feelings B) creeping them the hell out C) ruining something that could have been great.  I always find myself holding back how I feel in certain situations because I am scared of how the other person is going to react.  It baffles me how something so huge gets thrown around so freely.  Sure, tell your family, friends and loved ones that you love them but don't throw the words around like they don't mean anything.  I see so many young kids who have been dating someone for 2 days telling each other they love one another but honestly, do they even know what the means?

I love my friends.  I love my parents, my brother and sister-in-law, and I LOVE my nephew Dane more than anyone on the planet.  I love a lot of inanimate object.  But I will never tell someone I love them without actually getting to know them.  Getting to see who they are.  Understanding them.  That's what matters.  You have to be ready for things like that.  There are so many pressures in this world that falling in love shouldn't be one of them.  It should be nature.  I personally believe that a healthy relationship shouldn't be boasted about all over social media.  Granted people have their own opinions about this and have expressed them to me, but this is how I feel.  Judge me.  Give me shit.  Come at me.  To each their own.  You have your opinion and so do I.  Leave me be with mine and I will leave you be with yours.

Laugh often.  Smile More.  Love Wholeheartedly.

Xoxo.

Mr. & Mrs. Parker

I got the absolute pleasure of taking the pictures at my childhood friends wedding yesterday and let me tell you…. these guys are nuts!  In a good way!  So much fun! Here is a 'peek' at a few of the shots we did!